I’d like to thank the lovely Ellie Simpson for inspiring me to start writing a blog. I have far too much stuff happening in my mind to not keep some form of diary! It is slightly scary that this diary will be public, but as the tagline suggests, this blog is literally stuff from my brain to yours. I hope you find this cluster of ideas and thoughts a somewhat good read!
Anyone that knows me will know that (for the most part) I’m pretty relaxed. However, when I do feel strongly towards an opinion/subject the only way out of my spiral of thoughts is to vent about them. This is one of those times. I’ve been wearing makeup since y8 ( I am now in y11) and have been really into alternative fashion for about 2 years, but just recently I’ve started massively experimenting with my appearance. These changes include occasionally drawing on my eyebrows an unnatural colour or wearing purple lipstick. Maybe even wearing weird and wonderful clothes/putting my hair in space bus. This is something that I enjoy phenomenally because makeup has fascinated me from being young, and the possibilities that come with a bit of eyeshadow and lipstick are endless. Today was the first day that I went out in public wearing the makeup, hair and clothes that I have messed about with in my bedroom for the last month (displayed in the image above) and the reaction I received from members of the general public shocked me to say the least.
I’d like to just disclaim that I definitely expected some kind of reaction from the odd person. I didn’t walk out of the door with green eyebrows expecting no one to be a little dumbstruck. Also, I can take criticism/negative opinions about the way I chose to look. My maths teacher calls me a goth on a daily basis and I don’t bat an eyelid to it. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion and it’s only when said opinion is ignorant and discriminatory that it bugs me.
Another disclaimer before I delve into this subject more vastly, none of what I mention here is exaggerated.
Right, here we go…
I started today by setting off to catch a bus into town where I was meeting my friend. On this short journey, I passed a woman in her twenties and her (‘m assuming) young daughter holding her hand. Her daughter pointed at me from across the road to then be scolded by her mildly embarrassed mother. I didn’t really have a problem with this at all. I mean, it’s not the usual thing to happen whilst your walking to the bus stop but the little girl was only about five so I couldn’t really get offended. However, her mothers’ reaction did make me laugh a little.
Once I had then got to the bus stop and got on the bus, I walked past a couple in their late teens/early twenties who completely stopped their conversation to gawk at me in silence and then chuckle to each other when I sat down. This did upset me slightly because I felt like I should be embarrassed about dressing/looking the way I do. People staring at me is the least of my worries, but if you’re going to be blatantly rude about my appearance, at least make your reaction somewhat dignified.
After that experience, I met up with my wonderful (also pretty eccentric) friend Becca. She’s a gem. Anyways, throughout the day we received a variety of different looks and points and sniggers. If it wasn’t for me being with someone who is so strong willed I would have probably got more upset as the day went on, but in fact, things became happier. Each reaction taught me to laugh it off rather than get angry or upset by it. So for that, thank you Becca.
And finally, the walk home. The looks became less blatant and I learned to not take it personally, but as I approached my house, a City Taxi (calling you out for being such a dick) driver slowed down next to me, put his side window down and wolf whistled at me. I personally am never flattered by being wolf whistled at as I am not a Yorkshire Terrier nor am I someone who thinks it is at all necessary for women to be cat-called or degraded in that way. However, it wasn’t his whistle that made me feel small, but it was his snigger as he put his window back up and drove off. It was almost as if he felt like he needed to reassure me that his action was in sarcasm.
Although these things happening to me certainly haven’t made me feel great, they’ve made me think about the way society looks down on people who are different. Individuality is such a beautiful thing. If it wasn’t for each person being unique in some way, the world would be so much less fruitful and interesting. The point that I’m trying to get across is that its the year 2016 and treating people like they’re less of a person because they’re different is the dumbest thing imaginable. As cliche as it is, nobody should ever have to feel ashamed for expressing themselves. If you’re a boy and you want to wear a dress, go for it! Want to wear lots of makeup? Go ahead! Want to dye your hair green? There’s nothing stopping you! If you have the right attitude about your individuality, it immediately becomes the most attractive thing in the world.
So much of the worlds ideas and fashions and thoughts are bottled up because they’re deemed too strange or not ‘in’ or even, dare I say it, ‘gay’. Today, in the scheme of things, hasn’t been brilliant but it has allowed me to take negativity on the chin and focus on not caring what people think. If someone doesn’t like my appearance and they chose to talk about it rather than get on with their own lives, that’s their problem not mine.
And on that note, I hope this has made some of you less scared to be yourself despite the opinions of others. Go out and be the wonderful beings that you are!!
Thank you for reading,